Broncos-Patriots Preview

A complete preview of tonight's Broncos-Patriots Divisonal Playoff game can be viewed at my Broncos blog The Horsehead. Go Broncos!

World Series of Beer Pong

Jason Coben, and Nick Velissaris of Ann Arbor, Mich. won the World Series of Beer Pong tournament in Las Vegas winning a $10,000 grand prize. The two were undefeated in the final competition Thursday. Ladies and Gentlemen we have found our calling...

Johnny Mac beats Don Flamenco

These guys decided to recreate scenes from one of the best games of all-time Mike Tyson's Punch Out. Take a Look.

Whoever Made up this List Must be Gay

1. Britney Spears
2. Mary-Kate Olsen
3. Jessica Simpson
4. Eva Longoria
5. Mariah Carey
6. Paris Hilton
7. Lindsay Lohan
8. Shakira
9. Anna Nicole Smith
10. Renee Zellweger

This is:

a) Guest List for Matt Leinart's USC Graduation Party
b) A list of girls Derek would bang even though half of them are certifiably crazy
c) Mr. Blackwell's Top Ten Worst Dressed List

If you guessed b) and c) you are right. While Britney Spears has turned into white trash. Is Mary Kate that much worse of a dresser than Ashley? Can't he leave poor Lindsay alone? And Shakira??? Please.

"Live Torrid Sex" on Raw

You may have noticed that wrestling's ratings have taken a hit by the fact that you probably don't even think about watching anymore. Well the WWE did its best to get people to keep watching by promising a "Live Sex Celebration" between superstars Lita and new champion Edge in the middle of the ring on its Monday Night Raw program. The experiment worked as the show did the 4th best out of the past 52 shows as people actually believed they were going to see a real sex scene in the middle of the wrestling ring. While there was no actual sex some shots of Lita's boobies made stills that are going around the internet. Be warned the following link is NOT SAFE FOR WORK. Unless of course your job is scouring the internet for boobie pictures, in which case I hate you and don't want you reading my blog.

Not Safe for Work

Fear the Horsehead!

As most of my friends know, despite being a life long New Englander and Patriotic guy. I do not like the New England Patriots. It is not my fault they sucked, played with zero heart, and didn't sell out their home games so I didn't get to see them on TV when I was young and looking for something to watch on Sundays. They gave me the opportunity to discover my first sports love, the Denver Broncos. I have suffered through three Super Bowl losses with John Elway, celebrated Elway's two Super Bowl championships in his two final seasons, and endured the New England "Dynasty". Now my life has come full circle as my Broncos have a chance to end said dynasty Saturday night against the Patriots at Invesco Field at Mile High. I took some funny and unflattering pictures to get ready for this week. So check out all week, The Horsehead!

Enter The Horsehead!

So...How'd I Do?

Well the College Football Season is over and this blog should return to some sense of normalcy from here on in. Before it does, lets take some time to reflect. Back in August I projected the Top 25 at this time, rather than do a Preseason Top 25 like everyone else does. I got 15 out of 25 which is the equivalent of going 8-4 which is pretty good even though college football can be somewhat predictable. Here again is that Top 25 with actual results in bold and my comments in italics.


25. UTEP 2004: 8-4, Returning Starters: 11, Should Wins 11, Should Losses 1, Projected Bowl Result: Lose to Utah in Liberty Bowl- Mike Price takes his Miners into Conference USA (apparently Memphis has better strip clubs than Boise) to help fortify a conference without Louisville, Cincinnati, or South Florida. Price's program is on the way up, Conference USA is on the way down. Wins 8, Losses 4, Lost to Toledo in GMAC Bowl. Not sure if Coach Price enjoyed the strippers or not but the Miners have Carson Palmer’s brother at Quarterback and the brightest helmets in football, their future prospects of Conference USA titles seem bright as well.

24. Boston College 2004: 9-3, RS: 15, SW 9, SL 2, Projected Bowl Result: Lose to Syracuse in Meineke Car Care Bowl- BC has bolted the Big East to feud with obvious natural rivals Clemson, N.C. State, and Florida State (same colors). While I can't promise a "Clemson Sucks, Whitehurst Swallows" T-Shirt will ever make it to print, The Eagles should fare well in their new conference making yet another bowl. Wins 9, Losses 3, Beat Boise State in MPC Computers Bowl. The grass wasn’t greener on the other side for the Eagles, in fact at season’s end the field they played on was blue. Losses to Florida State, North Carolina, and Virginia Tech kept BC from reaching the nation’s elite. Now let’s just hope this program goes to hell. We’re out of time. Straight to hell.

23. Georgia 2004: 10-2, RS: 15, SW 9, SL 2, Projected Bowl Result: Lose to Iowa in Outback Bowl- With David Greene gone, Mark Richt's quarterback sounds like he should be performing at the Apollo Theater before he performs between the hedges. D.J. Shockley has the benefit of garbage time experience and an adoring public in Samford. Wins 10, Losses 3, Lost to West Virginia in Sugar Bowl. Started the season with three straight games in HD (a record for any other school but Notre Dame) and ended the season with three straight games in Atlanta (probably not a record). They were 3-0 in HD 2-1 in Atlanta but Shockley had a solid season.

22. Fresno State 2004: 9-3, RS: 17, SW 9, SL 2, Projected Bowl Result: Beat UAB in Hawai'i Bowl- The reason Fresno State hasn't joined the Pac-10 is because they are a menace to any Pac-10 team that schedules them. It will be tough for Fresno to duplicate a trend of Pac-10 upsets this year as they travel to Los Angeles to take on USC. Wins 8, Losses 5, Lost to Tulsa in Liberty Bowl. Pat Hill’s team almost gave the country the most enjoyable upset since Villanova-Georgetown against USC. Unfortunately they never tackled Reggie Bush. That may be true actually I have to look that up. Did they ever tackle him?

21. Iowa State 2004: 7-5, RS: 20, SW 9, SL 2, Projected Bowl Result: Beat Oregon in Holiday Bowl- Yeah, that's right Iowa State will earn the right to get crushed by Texas in the Big XII Championship Game. This program is on the rise but don't expect a New Year's Day bowl this year. Wins 7, Losses 5, Lost to TCU in Houston Bowl. The “up and coming” Iowa State as they were referred to during one of those player introductions on Monday Night Football had the same exact season as last year 7-5 losing their final game of the season to miss out on a spot in the Big XII Championship game.

20. Wyoming 2004: 7-5, RS: 19, SW 10, SL 1, Projected Bowl Result: Beat Arizona State in Emerald Bowl- Sorry I have nothing to say here. The state is shaped like a square, but they're supposed to be good. Wins 4, Losses 7, No Bowl. I probably should have done a little more research on Wyoming.

19. Boise State 2004: 11-1, RS: 17, SW 9, SL 2, Projected Bowl Result: Beat Georgia Tech in MPC Computers Bowl- If the Broncos beat Georgia on Sept. 3 and not make the BCS, I am making it my life's mission to bring down the institution forever. Do yourself a favor and watch one game on their famous blue turf, you won't be able to imagine college football any other way. Wins 9, Losses 4, Lost to Boston College in MPC Computers Bowl. Offense Coordinator Chris Peterson takes over as Dan Hawkins moves to Colorado after a 53-10 record at Boise. Boise State is still everything good about college football and I expect Coach Peterson to take over where Hawkins left off. And someday the crystal trophy will be paraded around blue turf. I have a dream!!

18. Texas Tech 2004: 8-4, RS: 16, SW 9, SL 2, Projected Bowl Result: Beat Penn State in Alamo Bowl- Supposedly, Mike Leach has a defense this year. I'll believe it when i see it. Wins 9, Losses 3, Lost to Alabama in Cotton Bowl. Texas Tech again led the country in passing offense and won the way they always won. Whether or not they’ll ever beat Texas is another issue.

17. Toledo 2004: 9-4, RS: 16, SW 11, SL 1, Projected Bowl Result: Beat Tulsa in Motor City Bowl Are Toledo head coach Tom Amstutz and Kansas head coach Mark Mangino related? Google both of them, then you tell me. Wins 9, Losses 3, Beat UTEP in the GMAC Bowl. Well Tom Amstutz is still fat and for that matter is so is Mark Mangino but Amstutz went for it on Fourth Down more than any other coach in Division 1-A and for that I applaud him.

16. Tennessee 2004: 10-3, RS: 16, SW 9, SL 2 Projected Bowl Result: Lose to The Ohio State in Capital One Bowl-This is lower than a lot of polls but I rank perpetual underachievers lower than most. Phillip Fulmer had a turbulent offseason and the 1999 Fiesta Bowl is becoming more of a memory with every year. Still Steve Spurrier's reinsertion into the conference should keep Fulmer focused and the way this team finished last season has all of Knoxville excited. Wins 5, Losses 6, No Bowl. Before you laugh think about this, in the Coaches Poll, they were Preseason No. 3.

15. Oklahoma 2004: 12-1, RS: 17, SW 10, SL 1 Projected Bowl Result: Lose to Auburn in Cotton Bowl-While chronic academic underachievers, Bob Stoops squad actually underachieved grossly on the field in the Orange Bowl last year. Adrian Peterson returns but not much else. That said, Oklahoma should make Texas earn the Red River Shootout and contend for the Big XII South title. Wins 8, Losses 5, Beat Oregon in Holiday Bowl. Don’t cry for Bob Stoops, Oklahoma just didn’t get out of the gate well and didn’t show up against Texas but they will be back next year and they’ll still have Adrian Peterson.

14. LSU 2004: 9-3, RS: 18, SW 11, SL 1 Projected Bowl Result: Lose to Michigan in Fiesta Bowl- I have to write this in cajun so here geauxs. Nick Saban has left and Les Miles comes from Eauxklahoma State. Running Backs Justin Vincent, Jeauxseph Addai, and Shyrone Carey will lead a predominantely running Eauxffense. SU coaching candidate Beaux Pellini will take on a leauxded defense. Wins 11, Losses 2, Beat Miami in Peach Bowl. Few people can name one player LSU has had in the past five years but they are always a top 10 team. They are one of the most dependable programs in the country. They’re come from behind win over Arizona State a week after Hurricane Katrina showed the kind of heart this program has had for some time.

13. Auburn 2004: 13-0, RS: 13, SW 9, SW 2 Projected Bowl Result: Beat Oklahoma in Cotton Bowl- Replacing a Quarterback and two Running Backs is tough but this team has a chip on their shoulder and Tommy Tuberville will not let them forget what happened to them last year. If my prediction rings true and they do draw Oklahoma in a bowl game, watch out. Wins 9, Losses 3, Lost to Wisconsin in Capital One Bowl. After losing Ronnie Brown and Cadillac Williams, Auburn actually improved their Rushing offense numbers with Kenny Irons.

12. Florida State 2004: 9-3, RS: 11, SW 9, SW 2 Projected Bowl Result: Beat South Carolina in Peach Bowl- Bobby Bowden was going to have a hard enough time replacing 11 starters, and then his starting quarterback jumped on a hood of a car calling himself "God". The jokes should flow swimmingly but wins over Miami and Virginia Tech will be harder to come by. Still FSU is Talent U and the freshman class this year is the best in the country. Wins 8, Losses 5, Lost to Penn State in Orange Bowl. Turns out Wyatt Sexton had Lyme Disease just like that crazy bitch that got slapped from Real World: Seattle. I know. I’m an insensitive prick. Florida State stumbled often this season but beat Virginia Tech in the ACC Championship Game and would’ve beaten Penn State in the Orange Bowl if they had a competent kicker. Again,kicking F’s FSU. Are you telling me there isn’t one kid in the entire high school football playing state of Florida that can boot sixty yarders from each hash that Florida State can’t out and out buy?

11. Iowa 2004: 10-2, RS: 13, SW 9, SW 2 Projected Bowl Result: Beat Georgia in Outback Bowl- This is Kirk Ferentz's last year at Iowa. The Bill Belichick protege will almost certainly find himself in the NFL next year. The potential for an explosive offensive is there and in the Big Ten explosive means 21 points per game. The defense is a little shaky and keeps this team from joining the nations elite. Wins 7, Losses 5, Lost to Florida in Outback Bowl. Iowa, Boise State, and USC were the only teams I had in the correct bowls and neither won like I had predicted. Kirk Ferentz is being considered for several NFL jobs and there is an uneasy AD in Iowa City.

10. The Ohio State 2004: 8-4, RS: 18, SW 10, SL 1 Projected Bowl Result: Beat Tennessee in Capital One Bowl- I really wish the Buckeyes would ask to be called The Ohio State when referred to on television. If your gonna make parents and boosters write checks to "The Ohio State University" you should give your football team the extra intimidation of being called The Ohio State. Like 'The Undertaker' or 'The Big Unit' people are more intimidated by anything that starts with The. Whether or not Michigan will be intimidated by The Ohio State coming up to Ann Arbor is another story. Tressel avoids probation, wins bowl games, and beats Michigan better than any other coach in OSU history, this year two out of three ain't bad. Wins 10, Losses 2, Beat Notre Dame in Fiesta Bowl. Sorry, Daren I couldn’t be more wrong about this year’s Buckeye team, I had them beating Texas and losing to Michigan when they did the exact opposite. While the linebacker corps will be all new. They will be a high preseason ranked team and I won’t be betting against them again even IN Austin next year.

9. Purdue 2004: 7-5, RS: 20, SW 11, SL 0 Projected Bowl Result: Lose to Louisville in Sugar Bowl-TRENDY PICK ALERT! Three reasons 1)20 starters, including the entire defense return 2) Neither The Ohio State or Michigan are on the schedule and 3) The Big Ten needs a round-robin schedule and Purdue taking their BCS spot through the back door may be what it takes to get it. If Joe Tiller can't win the Big Ten this year, he may be on the hot seat for next. Wins 5, Losses 6, No Bowl. No Ohio State or Michigan but Joe Tiller found plenty of other teams to lose to and those returning defensive starters may all be replaced next season.

8. Miami 2004: 9-3, RS: 14, SW 10, SL 1 Projected Bowl Result: Beat Pittsburgh in Gator Bowl- Three losses is an outrage in Coral Gables and there were some murmurs about what Larry Coker had or hadn't accomplished with a team outside of the one he inherited his first season. Donna Shalala signed him to a five year extension so the seat should be cool for Coker. Devin Hester is remote control stopper whenever the Canes' opponents are punting. I can't believe I'm saying this but DON'T SLEEP ON MIAMI! Wins 9, Losses 3, Lost to LSU in Peach Bowl. Coker had to fire several assistants to save face and this program is reeling. Whether this program can continue its stranglehold on recruiting in the South Florida area remains to be seen.

7. Utah 2004: 12-0, RS: 12, SW 11, SL 0 Projected Bowl Result: Beat UTEP in Liberty Bowl- It will be hard to duplicate last year's dream season, especially with Urban Meyer and Alex Smith out of the mix, but the schedule is favorable for another undefeated season. Don't expect the outcry for a BCS bowl again this year as their only BCS conference opponent is lowly Arizona. Wins 7, Losses 5, Beat Georgia Tech in Emerald Bowl. Looking back it was too much to ask Utah to duplicate their season of last year. They looked impressive against a Georgia Tech team that ended their season against Georgia.

6. Texas 2004: 11-1, RS: 17, SW 11, SL 1 Projected Bowl Result: Lose to Florida in Orange Bowl- The Eagles made the Super Bowl, the Red Sox beat the Yankees, certainly the next shoe should drop this year and Mack Brown can finally beat Oklahoma. Unfortunately, he picked the wrong year to visit The Shoe. An early loss to The Ohio State may trip up National Championship hopes, but a dream season can still be salvaged in Austin. Hopefully the 'Horns season will be more exciting than Real World: Austin's season. Wins 13, Losses 0, Beat USC in Rose Bowl. I guess it would’ve been good if I had seen SOME Vince Young before making this projection. While they escaped Columbus with a win, they steamrolled through the Big XII and Young himself beat USC in Pasadena in one of the most enjoyable college football games ever.

5. Florida 2004: 7-5, RS: 13, SW 11, SL 1 Projected Bowl Result: Beat Texas in Orange Bowl- I feel like I've been reading about Chris Leak all my life. If he can get his head around himself and Urban Meyer's offense, the sky is the limit for this talented crew. You think Urban Meyer can score more UF girls than Billy Donovan? You think either have tried? Wins 9, Losses 3, Beat Iowa in Outback Bowl. Two more wins and hands down the best recruiting class in the country coming to Gainesville next year and its easy to say Urban Meyer has things looking up at Florida.

4. Louisville 2004: 11-1, RS: 15, SW 11, SL 0 Projected Bowl Result: Beat Purdue in Sugar Bowl- I just know we're in for a whole year of "Louisville should be in Rose Bowl","No, they shouldn't","They're undefeated in a BCS conference","The Big East should not be allowed to exist!" Brian Brohm is an upgrade over Stefan Lefors and let the controversy ring all year long, dragging the Big East's good name through the mud the whole way through. Wins 9, Losses 3, Lost to Virginia Tech in Gator Bowl. They didn’t run the table in the Big East which is probably the best thing the conference could hope for. Bobby Petrino will forever be a big time coaching prospect but as long as he remains this program should go to bowls, representing the Big East for some time to come.

3. Virginia Tech 2004: 10-4, RS: 14, SW 12, SL 0 Projected Bowl Result: Lose to USC in Rose Bowl- I want to pick the Hokies so bad, I want you to walk away with a surprise at the end of this blog, I really do. I see Va Tech winning the toughest conference in football and earning a spot in the Rose Bowl. But with Marcus Mexico behind center (and he's still the black sheep) and Frank "Lollipop, Lollipop, OH OH OH LOLLIPOP!" coaching against Matt Leinart, Reggie Bush and the rest of the 2004 National Champions. I can't pick them, sorry. Wins 11, Losses 2, Beat Louisville in Gator Bowl. If blue is the new black, Va Tech is the new U. The team is trying to prevent this and kicked Marcus Mexico off its team, when he probably was going to the NFL draft anyway. The funny thing is he got kicked off the team in front of his Mom. Which must’ve been uncomfortable for all the “Michael never got kicked off his college football team” tongue lashings on the drive home.

2. Michigan 2004: 9-3, RS: 16, SW 10, SL 1 Projected Bowl Result: Beat LSU in Fiesta Bowl- Chad Henne isn't a freshman anymore. Jamesville-DeWitt's Mikey Hart isn't either and isn't in the Carrier Dome. They host THE Ohio State. The Big Ten is a tough conference and getting past Iowa in Iowa City maybe too much to ask, but this team is loaded and will be for a while. Sorry, Daren. Wins 7, Losses 5, Lost to Nebraska in Alamo Bowl. Never so happy to be wrong about a team. Hart was injured most of the season and the defense didn’t show up the entire season. The highlight of their season had to be spoiling Penn State’s undefeated season with 2 seconds left Lloyd Carr had to bitch to get back on the clock. As the T-shirt in Columbus says “Fuck Michigan”.

1. USC 2004: 13-0, RS: 15, SW 11, SL 0 Projected Bowl Result: Beat Virginia Tech in Rose Bowl- Yeah, that's right you read this whole thing just to see me pick who everybody else picks. I'm sorry, but I'm going with the house. Plus we'll get weeks of Paul's Annotated Pizza Parlor just calling me an idiot. Wins 12, Losses 1, Lost to Texas in Rose Bowl. Not sure what Matt Leinart got in Ballroom Dancing but he didn’t get a Heisman or a National Title in Football. Reggie Bush made college football enjoyable to a lot of people that wouldn’t be watching otherwise and Pete Carroll will continue to reload but the three-Pete was not to be. A great season of college football was. See you next August!!

Fear The Horsehead

As most of my friends know, despite being a life long New Englander and Patriotic guy. I do not like the New England Patriots. It is not my fault they sucked, played with zero heart, and didn't sell out their home games so I didn't get to see them on TV when I was young and looking for something to watch on Sundays. They gave me the opportunity to discover my first sports love, the Denver Broncos. I have suffered through three Super Bowl losses with John Elway, celebrated Elway's two Super Bowl championships in his two final seasons, and endured the New England "Dynasty". Now my life has come full circle as my Broncos have a chance to end said dynasty Saturday night against the Patriots at Invesco Field at Mile High. I took some funny and unflattering pictures to get ready for this week. So check out all week, The Horsehead!

Enter The Horsehead!