Tuesday, August 16, 2005

College Football's Must-See Game of Each Week

I will make this my first prediction of this blog: There will be a college football game to watch every minute for twelve hours every Saturday this season. Between CBS, ABC, NBC, ESPN, ESPN 2, ESPN Plus, ESPN Plus 2, ESPN U, ESPN U2, and Fox Sports Net if your favorite college football team isn't on television, then they just plain suck and you shouldn't like them anyway.

However with so many games on a given week, it can be difficult to sort the great matchups and interesting games from all the crappy college football that can be out there.

So as a service to you the viewer the following is the 'Game of the Week' for every week of the college football season.

September 3- Boise State at Georgia: Do you believe in miracles? Actually this is more Super Bowl III than the 1980 Winter Olympics, because we can find out if Boise State and teams of the like can compete with the best BCS Conference teams. If Boise State wins Trev Alberts has to kiss Bronco coach Dan Hawkins ass. Well, not really but I can dream.

September 10- Arizona State at LSU: Yes, The Ohio State does play Texas this week, but I'm watching this for the crowd shots. From my observations, there is not a bad looking girl that goes to either of these two schools. I'm hoping for a blowout either way.

September 17- Tennessee at Florida: The winner of this game has the inside track on the SEC East title and could start a run for the Roses.

September 24: Notre Dame at Washington: Tyrone Willingham gets his dream shot at 'The Man' who persist on keeping the black man down. Kill Whitey!

October 1- South Carolina at Auburn: As coach of Florida, Steve Spurrier reacted to the news of a fire at a library on Auburn's campus, "The sad news is half the books hadn't been colored in yet." Now he takes his subpar South Carolina team into Jordan-Hare, for once that state trooper escort out of the stadium may be necessary.

October 8- Oklahoma vs. Texas (in Dallas): The Red River Rivalry has been more The Hammer-Nail Rivalry for the past few years, but if this Texas team can't beat OU, none can and Mack Brown may never.

October 15- Louisville vs. West Virginia: No Francisco Garcia, no Kevin Pittsnogle, but this is Louisville's only obstacle to being college football's pain-in-the-ass undefeated team of the season.

October 22- Michigan at Iowa: You miss college football until you hear Brent Musberger call a Michigan game, Blue gets The Ohio State at home this year and if they tackle this trip to Iowa City we could get a true Rose Bowl as our National Championship.

October 29- South Carolina at Tennessee: The Ole Ball Coach returns to the listings taking on his hated rival Phillip Fulmer. This may be the first game with a pregame brawl between coaches.

TUESDAY November 1- UAB at Memphis: 1)One of few chances to catch Memphis Running Back Deangelo Williams and scout him for your fantasy draft next year 2) UAB's quarterback Darrell Hackney tips the scales at 240 and is a dead ringer for Biz Markie. There's nothing more fun to watch than a fat quarterback have to scramble 3)IT'S ON A TUESDAY, what else are you gonna watch? These teams have had like 15 days to come up with gimmick plays and if they're crazy enough to schedule a game on a Tuesday, anything is possible.

November 5- Miami at Virginia Tech: Note to security, don't let Mike Tranghese in without a thorough check of his belongings. Seriously though this is another BCS placement game as both teams can handle Florida State.

November 12- Navy at Notre Dame: Gold helmets, the green grass of Notre Dame Stadium, Touchdown Jesus. This is your HD game of the year! If your not a snob like me and don't have HD, go to Best Buy and check this game out.

November 19- Fresno State at USC: Let's put it this way, I might put up goal posts in my backyard and if Fresno State wins, I may knock them down myself and carry them across my block. Yes, I will be drunk.

November 26- Florida State at Florida: My favorite rivalry as it always turns out to be exciting and competitive every year, that's all. Urban Meyer's pomade should beat Bobby Bowden's straw hat but it will be close, trust me.

December 3- Army vs. Navy (in Philadelphia): To show I'm not a heartless prick, I may well up at the end of the Army-Navy game each year. I may.

I hope that helps you to watch more college football this season, however now the hard part; Check your local listings for stations and times.



At 12:53 PM , Blogger Mike said...

That is a lot of games. I will try and watch some college football this year. I really think that I would watch more if there was a playoff system. But that is not happening anytime soon.

At 5:45 AM , Blogger Paul said...

Pittsnogle rules!


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