The 2006 Pizza Parlor Mock NFL Draft

This Saturday and Sunday is the 2006 NFL Draft and while I'll be away at the Miss New Hampshire Pageant for most of it, everyone else has a Mock Draft so why not myself. So without further ado, here is The Pizza Parlor's 2006 NFL Mock Draft:

1. Houston Texans: Reggie Bush, RB Southern Cal- This happens every year there is an obvious #1 pick. The team waits until the week before the draft to start negotiations. Columnists write about his negatives and ponder alternatives. In this case the negatives are his durability, signability, and the changing impact of Running Backs in the NFL, the alternative is Mario Williams. Reggie Bush will be a star in the NFL and could take the Houston Texans into contention in two years. The chance of not taking him and watching his highlights on Primetime every week is not one Gary Kubiak and the Texans are going to take.


2. New Orleans Saints: Mario Williams, DE North Carolina State- The best player available to a team that just plain needs players, which is why trading down is a possibility. I do feel Williams has the biggest bust potential out of the top 5. Matt Leinart and Vince Young are possibilities here because Drew Brees is the NFL's Elliot Yamin. Talented, does everything you need him to do each week, but do you think the Marketing Machine known as American Idol is in any rush to start selling Elliot Yamin CDs? Do you think Saints fans are as excited about Drew Brees? The shoulder is also a question mark and Young especially could reignite enthusiasm in Saints football.

3. Tennessee Titans: Vince Young, QB Texas- Looks like Norm Chow is getting outvoted here as insider reports have everyone else high on this playmaker. If Young doesn't go here he could take be another victim of "Texas Hold'em" a new phenomenon post Ricky Williams that has NFL General Managers careful of taking a Texas Longhorn very high.

4. New York Jets: D'Brickashaw Ferguson, T Virginia- D'Brickashaw is a takeoff off the Reverend Ralph de Briccasart character in the Colleen McCullogh's 1977 best-selling book "The Thorn Birds". Ferguson is a youth minister. Hopefully he will be able to forgive the thousands of Jets fans that boo him because he isn't Matt Leinart.

(We'll get our first green room shot of Matt Leinart at this point)

5. Green Bay Packers: Haloti Ngata, DT Oregon- The Packers are growing interest in him and not for the same reasons I'd be: A chance to see Kabeer Gbajia-Biamila and Haloti Ngata in the same defensive line and see Joe Buck's head explode during the next Packers broadcast.

6. San Francisco 49ers: Vernon Davis, TE Maryland- The 49ers are making no secret he is their guy. He could be the weapon that saves Alex Smith's career. I hate the 49ers so I'm not wasting too much time on their pick. Possible trade up from Denver to get this spot and Davis also.

7. Oakland Raiders: Ice Cube, OG Compton- I'd love to see the Raiders screw up this pick, and of course its a possibility but its almost impossible A.J. Hawk a guy you figure Al Davis has to be in love with is there on a team that added a Free Agent Quarterback and needs SERIOUS help on defense. I may have to donate my Away #47 jersey to my brother but Hawk should be a fan favorite in Raider Nation.

(We'll get another shot of Matt Leinart in the green room, his eyes are shut and he's in full incline, disappointment and perhaps regret for not coming out earlier setting in)

8. Buffalo Bills: Winston Justice, OT Southern Cal- I don't see why the Bills wouldn't take a look at Leinart. Did J.P. Losman show anything to make anyone in Buffalo, even on the Empire Network, think he's going to be a Super Bowl winning quarterback? The line in Buffalo is horrible and Justice would be a welcome addition. Just keep him away from the toy guns.

9. Detroit Lions: Chad Jackson, WR Florida- You can never have too many Wide Receivers. I'm kidding of course. Rod Marinelli is a defensive guy and the Lions signed 10 quarterbacks this offseason. I think Michael Huff CB, Texas goes here and fills an obvious need in Detroit. Two Florida State guys Ernie Sims and Broderick Bunkley could go here too if of course they can get their butts low.

(We get a shot of Matt Leinart in the green room, turns out he was being orally serviced by two Song Girls and he couldn't care less where he goes. The cameraman tries to push Nick Lachey out of the way as he holds a copy up of his new CD) Just as we can't take the torture any longer...

10. Arizona Cardinals: Matt Leinart, QB Southern Cal- With only Kurt Warner, John Navarre, and Rohan Davey as Quarterbacks and moving into a new stadium, the Cardinals were looking strongly at Jay Cutler. But they probably had no idea Leinart would fall to them. Cutler may have a chip on his shoulder anytime he visits Glendale but the Cardinals now have themselves a franchise Quarterback.


11. St. Louis Rams: Brodrick Bunkley, DT Florida State-...

12. Cleveland Browns: Kamerion Wimbley, OLB Florida State-...

13. Baltimore Ravens: Ernie Sims, OLB Florida State- Hey you think with all this Florida State talent in the First Round that there's a chance Jenn Sterger will be in attendance? And with three top 13 picks on their defense how did they lose three games this year? I always end up wondering this at some point in every draft. I will be doing the same with UConn and Michigan State in June.

(Jay Cutler now gets his own ESPN camera man)

14. Philadelphia Eagles: Santonio Holmes, WR The Ohio State- Had some bobbling issues in the Buckeye game I went to last year but the Eagles need to move on from Terrell Owens and this is a good message to their fans that they plan to do so without relying on Todd Pinkston.

15. Denver Broncos: Manny Lawson, DE North Carolina State- I wouldn't go to Vegas with this just wanted to make a few points. I fully expect the Broncos to trade out of this pick either up or down and if they stay everyone and their brother is picking them to take Chad Jackson, the Wide Receiver from Florida to add to the receiving corps of the 37 year old Rod Smith and the out-the-door next year Ashley Lelie. It's not a good year to be in need of a Wide Receiver though and Denver really needs a pass rusher more than anything else. Lawson is this year's Mike Mamula. That's a not a good thing the day AFTER the draft. If this happens I'll be calling somebody very angry.

16. Miami Dolphins: Chad Jackson, WR Florida- With all due respect to Marty Booker. Daunte Culpepper would sure enjoy another weapon on offense on the other side of Chris Chambers.

17. Minnesota Vikings: Jay Cutler, QB Vanderbilt- You get a lot of practice throwing the ball when you play FOR Vanderbilt and AGAINST Florida, Georgia, LSU, Auburn, and Tennessee. Expect to see a lot of those teams third strings in the fourth quarter on his highlight reel. I guess that's my way of saying I don't believe the hype.


18. Dallas Cowboys: Donte Whitner, FS The Ohio State- Seems like a natural match here. Probably could have tackled Ron Dayne out of Field Goal range last year and should be a great tandem with Roy Williams. Parcells gets his way with this pick as Jerry Jones owes him one to say the least.

19. San Diego Chargers: Johnathan Joseph, CB South Carolina- Gets the edge over the sexier pick Tye Hill because his size allows him to play Nickel as well.

20. Kansas City Chiefs: Tye Hill, CB Clemson- I just feel like Tye Hill sounds like a Chiefs name. They were also at the bottom of the league in pass defense last year. This would help.

21. New England Patriots: Chad Greenway, OLB Iowa- The ultimate "Belichick Guy" at the Patriots position of need coached by a Belichick protege in college, possibly going as high as 10 falls to New England. I hate this team.

22. San Francisco 49ers: Jimmy Williams, CB Virginia Tech- This sexy pick coupled with other sexy pick Vernon Davis will earn the 49ers high grades on Sunday. Williams could start right away for San Francisco.

23. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Nick Mangold C, The Ohio State- Mangold is one of the smartest players in this draft. He will be at least a five-time Pro Bowler and if you think this is high for a Center. With many teams converting to a 3-4 scheme, the Center position isn't where you hide a third Guard anymore.

24. Cincinnati Bengals: Mercedes Lewis, TE UCLA- This could be the first reach in Round 1 because Marvin Lewis wants a Tight End badly plus he could be united with his long lost son. I don't think he is his son, but no man like Marvin Lewis ever really knows.

25. New York Giants: Bobby Carpenter, LB The Ohio State- I know the Giants just signed LaVar Arrington, but they were desparately searching for linebackers at the end of last year. Everyone that saw last year's The Ohio State-Michigan game remembers Carpenter crying when he went up lame after the third play on defense. The game has that kind of effect on some guys and those guys are the ones you want on your team.

26. Chicago Bears: DeMeco Ryans, LB Alabama- The Bears are young enough that they can and probably will trade out of the First Round this year. It's too bad because judging from the few Alabama games I've seen, Ryans is going to be a player.

27. Carolina Panthers: LenDale White, RB Southern Cal- Bra comments and poor workouts aside. I think John Fox can motivate White to lose the pounds and become a Stephen Davis like force for Carolina. Besides, everyone has White (from Denver) going to Pittsburgh and I would HATE to see that happen. Yes, I'm still scarred.

28. Jacksonville Jaguars: Tamba Hali, DE Penn State- This is a reach pick but I think Jacksonville likes the value picks at Running Back later in the draft. They need an added pass rush and Hali may or may not provide that.

29. New York Jets: D'Angelo Williams, RB Memphis- There will be euphoria at Radio City Music Hall and over my e-mail on Monday if the Jets land Williams with D'Brickashaw or Leinart. He may not be happy slipping all this way down the First Round but he should see some immediate time and should be starting by 2007.

30. Indianapolis Colts: Ashton Youboty, CB The Ohio State- Indy still needs to go defense and this may be my last time to say Youboty is a Fine Bubble pick. I can't stop looking at Youboty. That's USC, Florida State and The Ohio State all with at least three First Round picks.


31. Seattle Seahawks: Antonio Cromartie, CB Florida State- Cromartie would've been a Top 5 pick if he didn't blow his ACL and miss all of last year. When your picking 31 it means you have a pretty good team and can afford to take risks like this.

32. Pittsburgh Steelers: Laurence Maroney, RB Minnesota- Not sure if he's meant to play Steeler football. Actually I hope he isn't.